new toy

I now have a wireless laptop, so I can take the Internet with me wherever I go. I know, what took me so long? Have never really felt the need before. We are going to Kentucky for two weeks to see the World Equestrian Games, and I want to use it there to check e-mail, facebook, etc. No, my phone does not have those capabilities!
Bonus-I can now use a computer while Howie is hogging the home computer to play his endless Bridge games. Yay!

sunday

An ambivalent day. On the one hand, a day to take your time and enjoy whatever comes. On the other, one must get ready to go back to work the next day. Two sides of the same coin. That was my day.
I was able to get to the barn early enough to beat the worst part of the heat. Rode outdoors and enjoyed it. I made sure to incorporate bending and some shoulder in in my warm up, and it paid off. Pixie was soft and responsive. Ten minutes of nice trot. I was the only one in the arena; a good day to practise galloping in two point. It took two laps for her to work up to a good speed. Then two laps going as fast as we could in the confines of the arena. Turn, and do it again the other way. It only took 4 minutes, but I was winded. Pixie seemed to enjoy it. After a walk break, I went back to trot and did some serpentines so Pixie would have to think and didn't have time to get pissy about obeying again after the fun. It worked, she only fussed a little. Then a few minutes of long and low trot on the buckle. What a rewarding ride!
Some barn chores, turned PT out for a few minutes, and I was done just after noon. More chores at home, but also time to sew and make some killer lemonade. As the day winds down, I am sorry to see another weekend go. You never know what the week will bring; I like to start out thinking it will be productive and go smoothly.

the reason why

Wednesday evening I had the kind of ride that is the reason why horsepeople live and breathe. It was a pleasant evening, no one else around, and even after working all day I was ready to ride.
We didn't do anything special, just rode in the outdoor arena, but everything came together to make an ordinary day into one that will keep me going through the rough days for a long time. I was relaxed and easy on Pixie, she was relaxed and easy carrying me. We communicated without effort, like we were reading each other's minds. Our bodies flowed together in a calm, harmonious dance. I had thought to ride only for a short while, but I was having so much fun that time was irrelevant. Pixie and I were just in the moment, together.
I wish I could capture that feeling more often, but maybe one thing that makes it so special is that it is fleeting and rare. All I know for sure is that all the sweat, tears, vet bills, and hard knocks are nothing compared to this one superlative ride. This is my reason why.

anniversary

Today is my (and Howie's) anniversary. I have known him for 20 years, and we've been married for 19. Love changes, but he is still my friend, advisor, and the rock that I depend on. One reason I married him is he was always there when I needed him. Oh, he can exasperate and frustrate the hell out of me with his habits and attitudes. But at the core, he is dependable and he does care, even if his way of showing it sometimes is to treat me like a child. For better or for worse, we are and have been in it for the long haul. I try to appreciate him while I have him, because odds are that someday I will go on without him. I am an independent, stubborn creature; but I have to admit that marriage is what has shaped me for the past two decades. I am able to take my flights of fancy partly (or mostly) because I have solid backup. I am grateful for that. So, Happy Anniversary Howie! And many more!

falling

My chiropractor says that rolling is what saved me. When you fall, you are supposed to tuck and roll. As if a normal person can think of that in the split second before the earth hits you. And there is no way I am going to practice falling off my horse. Surprisingly, the top riders do control their falls by rolling. But mine was simply momentum. My head hit, and I did a somersault from the force of my forward motion. BTW, if your helmet hits the ground, you need to replace it. My new one is on the way.

weekend

This weekend, back to normal. Rode Pixie on Friday, good ride. Tried to go without pain med that night, but ended up hurting all over. So I took Tylenol at 4am. Saturday, I felt fine. Pixie is doing fine, too. I rode a little with Priscilla; a nice day to ride outside. Sunday was nothing spectacular, just an everyday type ride of walk, trot, canter, stop, circle. I didn't hurt afterwards. So back to my boring life, which I appreciate now more than ever.

feeling much better

I love my chiropractor. Saw him yesterday morning, and as expected, I was a mess. He worked wonders and now I have much better range of motion and less pain in my neck. He understands sports injuries; his wife is an equestrian and he rides cycles. He didn't think I was crazy for going to the event after my fall. Somebody understands! That made me feel better, too. I get tired easily, and don't have much energy. Taking a nap helps. Guess I just have to give myself more time. But I want my mo-jo back. I think it's laying around in the indoor arena somewhere. If anyone finds it, let me know. My friend Cheryl wants to do Reiki on me, maybe she can put it back where it belongs.

tuesday

Finally got my head x-rayed this morning. It's not broken, though some might say my mental function is. And I have been crabby a lot since the fall. I have good reason, but it gets tiresome even to me.
I am giving Pixie a round of bute. She is really put out about that. I wish horses could make the connection between that nasty stuff we give them and feeling better.
So we are on the mend, and I am making myself a consolation prize. They were giving garment bags as one of the prizes at the show, and I wanted one! So I am putting together some nice pictures that I will make transfers of and iron on some fabric for a custom garment bag. My way of healing.

learning to link

Trial post to figure out how to link blog to facebook.

trixie

Trixie caught a BIG dragonfly this morning. Wingspan must have been about 6-7 inches. Now she thinks she's the great calico hunter. It kept her busy for at least an hour. I kind of felt sorry for it, but I don't get as into insects as I do furry or feathered creatures. Even so, I try not to kill them myself if I can release them somewhere instead. Exceptions: mosquitoes, horse flies, and other biting or otherwise vicious ones (except bees, of course). But I digress-this was supposed to be about my cute calico kitty and how proud she was of her catch. Now maybe she will stop going after squirrels. She wouldn't know what to do with one if she did catch it, which I hope never happens!

winners

I'm a winner, after all. It occurs to me that to have participated in the event at all after that fall means that I am the kind of person who has the winner mentality. It was in the top five of the worst tumbles I have ever taken, on or off a horse. I feel like I accomplished something and I am a stronger person as a result.
I just wish my head would stop hurting. My forehead is so sore; I keep looking for a bruise but there isn't one. Now that the event is over, I am feeling the aches and pains. Good thing I am going to the chiropractor on Thursday. Will try to get an x-ray before then just to be sure nothing is broken.
Pixie is fine. She didn't eat her mash yesterday because I put her bute in it instead of struggling to put it in her mouth. Mistake-she didn't get the bute or the mash. So today, I did the bute dance with her and succeeded without too much trouble. Then we went out to graze and I did some Tai Chi while she munched. It felt good to move the Tai Chi way; I think it helped. I will give Pixie bute for five days and only light work for the next two weeks. I hope that will be enough to make her feel better.
Longer term, I may try to do a hunter show sometime in August if I can find one. Something easy to get back into the game. Only if Pixie tells me she feels up to it. I am going to listen to her a lot better from now on.

The event yesterday was at least a learning experience. I felt good, and it was a very nice day. Barb came with me and was invaluable as a coach. Eva and Priscilla came to watch, which was very nice.
It just didn't work out as I had hoped, and I am a little disappointed. There is much I need to work on, and doing all three phases in one day is challenging. There were some good parts. I was surprised by which parts were good and which weren't. Pixie did a flowing, forward dressage test even though the judge stopped us during the test; and Pixie jumped out of the arena at the first canter depart. That was really the best part of the day. I even got to wear the jacket that I spent so much time sewing.
I thought xc would be the best part, as Pixie and I both like that best. She refused at the first obstacle! Which was a tiny flower box! I finally made her walk over it. She refused again at the second fence, but I circled, went over, and she finally got into the game and took off. The hanging log that I thought might give us trouble was easy, even though I lost both my stirrups at the jump before it and spent the time in between getting them back. I felt like we were going really fast and that Pixie was just barely in control during the last half of the course. But we got over all the jumps, including the barrels that were the final obstacle. Turns out I was going very slowly and I got time faults. But that was the most fun part of the day.
The warm up for jumping went well. Barb told me to think of it as a hunter course, and that helped me with my confidence because Pixie and I know how to do hunters. But neither Pixie or I were game for it. The fall was too fresh in my mind; and I have a feeling that Pixie has been refusing and chipping in due to pain in her feet. It's just not like her to refuse a jump, even if I do something wrong. The first jump on the course was a small oxer, and we had three refusals right there. Both of us were just done. I jumped the xrail in the warmup area, and quit for the day. Like I said, I learned a lot and there were some good parts. I will be better prepared for next year.

Forgot this part

I also had a flat tire! Forgot about that part. Actually, it is a slow leak that I tried to get Costco to fix on Wednesday. They stalled and told me to come back if it gets low again. Well, thanks a lot, when I got in the car to go home from the barn, it was almost flat. Had to stop and get air, but first had to drive on C470 with it like that! Costco is going to get a piece of my mind, if I can find it. On the way home, I also tried to go to the chiropractor. Get this-there had been a power outage and the computers were down, so they couldn't even help me! They are useless without the computers! I knew I shouldn't have gotten out of bed.

Reality Check

Today was a weird day, can I have a do-over? It started out OK. Tai Chi was very good. I sold my scooter. Kinda sorry to see her go, but I was limited on where I could go on her, so it just didn't seem worth it to keep her around.
Went to the barn for my lesson, and it was going really well, until I fell off. Wow, I haven't done a somersault in a long time-and I don't want to do one like that again. It was an accident. Pixie stumbled after a jump, stopped, and I kept going right over her head. We were almost done for the day! I saw stars for a minute, but got back on and kept at it until I felt normal again. It took a little while. It won't stop me, but I will be a little stiff on Saturday. I have ice on my neck as I write this. Next, a bath with Epsom salts. And lots of ibuprofen. Now I know how Ali felt at the Seabreeze show, but I don't bounce like she did.
The day gets weirder. When Howie got home, he had a story for me. He was walking on his lunch hour in the 16th street mall. Suddenly noticed a car following him, then two guys running at him. He stopped. He thought they would run past him. They didn't. They were US Marshalls looking for a fugitive. Asked him for his ID and held up a picture to compare to his face. When they were done, Howie turned around and there was an SUV right there with a "dog the bounty hunter" looking guy in it. God, Howie's IRS ID badge saved him! Only the IRS is scarier than US Marshalls! It's not safe out there! Quoted from Q, on Star Trek Next Generation.
We are both now safe at home and thankful for that. I still want my do-over. Some days, I wouldn't get out of bed if I knew what was going to happen. Now for that bath...

Monday before work I was very productive. Washed saddle pads, did Tai Chi, and made a big pot of spaghetti. Work went quickly because I was in decontam and there were 30 cases! At least Georgina wasn't there, so I didn't have to think of ways to avoid her toxicity. An empty basket fell on my thumb and hurt like hell. It hurt that night, too, and my hand was weak. Not good right before an event. Tuesday, I filled out an incident report just in case there was nerve damage or something. This is Wednesday morning, and it is almost back to normal thank goodness. I overstaffed today, so it will be 6 days off in a row for me! Yea!

I really needed the extra day to get ready. I ironed my jacket and shirt, washed my gloves, and got everything in order so I don't have to think about it on Sat. morning. Received my ride times-11:o6 for dressage, 1:24 for xc, and 2:24 for jumping. I will only have to get up about 45 minutes earlier than I usually do-great!

Used today to catch up on other chores like getting an oil change and the pictures from Mesa Verde developed.

My show nerves are starting. Last night, I woke up and had a hard time getting back to sleep. I tried to use the time for mental rehersal, but that made it worse. From now till Saturday, my main focus is to let go of the nerves and concentrate on having a good time. Wish me luck with that!

There are 11 entries in my division, and I really want to be in the ribbons; but having a fun and safe day is much more important.

back to normal

OK, the rant is over. Back to my day, which was good. Tai Chi in the morning after chores. At the barn, the first thing I did was let Pixie run in the arena. She had a great gallop. Man, she can do a beautiful extended trot when she's running loose. Talked to Priscilla while our horses grazed. I had told myself that today my main goal was to go easy on Pixie, refrain from micromanagement. I came close. I only rode for half and hour; in the indoor out of the sun. Pixie was a little disobedient. I started to micromanage, then caught myself and gave her more latitude to find the right thing. Then I also practiced letting go of mistakes and going on. We did a decent test. Pixie got her leads, and she gave me four good square halts. I am pleased. She gets a well deserved two days off.

this is fun

When I created this blog, I didn't think I would have much to say. But I do, as that last post should make clear. This is a great place to rant. And rant I will, when the need arises. Thank-you.

western pleasure riders

Are all western pleasure riders dumb as rocks? Do they start out that way, or does going round and round at a mind numbing pace hour after hour turn their brains to jelly? How hard is it to figure out that all the horses in the arena don't have to go in the same direction? Why doesn't passing left to left come naturally? Did they learn to drive in Europe? NO, it's not courteous to stop, blocking my way, and ask "do you want to reverse?" when I am coming at you at a trot and say "rail"!! Then you supposedly make it better by saying you are just trying to be courteous!! You are trying to be an ass hole and you succeeded!! Like I told you, if you reverse every time I do, you are going to be changing direction a lot. More than you have ever had the initiative to do on your own in 20 years of riding. Because you are brain dead!

Sunday

Some Sundays are for relaxation, others for chores. This morning I have already been on the roof with Howie to help change the pump in the swamp cooler, swept the deck, and washed throw rugs. Next-clean the kitchen and bath. After all that, I get to play, which means going to the barn, of course.
Nightmare last night. This was so weird that I want to record it. I dreamt that I was with a bunch of people from a shipwreck. We were in a house, and I realized that the others were practicing cannibalism. There was a corpse that they were cutting the face off of. I had an orange cat with me, and a friend named Emmy. When I found out what was going on, I went to the front door to leave, but it was nailed shut from the outside. I was hungry, and they offered me some of the "meat", but I knew what it was and didn't eat it. I took Emmy by the hand, and we escaped somehow. They came after us, but I yelled for help. Then I was carrying Emmy because she was too weak to continue. Some where along the line, my boss came along in his car and took us home. He gave us cheerios to eat. I knew I had to go back for my cat. The police came and took me back to get him. Then I woke up. My real cat was rubbing me, wanting scratches. Wow! I have weird dreams, but that one was worse than most!

A Good Lesson

Saturday morning: I finished the helmet bag that I started last nite. Had a lesson at 10am, so left early to get ready. Barb really put pressure on me to see if I was mentally ready, and it turns out that I need more focus. I thought I was relaxed, but I tensed up doing dressage and didn't get my game on again until jumping some xc fences. Pixie really told me about it, too! So that was a good lesson in preparation. Mental rehearsal time!
The rest of the day was easy. I visited at Bibber, had lunch w/Barb, and chilled out at home. Received the amethyst charm that I ordered from Susan, and realized how many caring, positive people I now have in my life. I am grateful for these souls who help, guide, and share my journey.
Small sewing project-made a lavender sachet from my own lavender flowers for my pillow and another with lavender bath salts for my helmet.

New Blog

Life is good. I am grateful for the wonderful people, animals, and things in my life, and for the activities I get to enjoy. In this space, I will chronicle activities and feelings of my everyday life.

This is the last week leading up to the event at Pendragon Stud, so I am concentrating of getting ready for that. I have wanted to compete there for three years, and finally get the chance. The first year, I just wasn't ready. The second year, I had to be out of town to attend my mother's 90th birthday celebration. This year, I'm going! My major feeling at this point is confidence. Pixie had injuries all winter and was out of commission for a long time. At first I thought I would not be able to ride this year. Persistance and lots of vet visits took care of her, and now she is better than ever! Then, a great thing happened-Barb agreed to give me lessons again. It's true that you don't know what you've got till it's gone; I did not find anyone that came close to Barb for lessons while she was away at a distant barn. In just a couple of weeks, she has helped me get ready and feel confident for this event. I also spent many hours at the sewing machine making myself a tailored riding jacket. I don't know if it will be too hot to wear it; but I will look sharp if I do. So here I am, almost ready to go! I am beginning to get excited in anticipation. I will be using that excitement to my advantage on course.

Meantime, life goes on and I have chores to do.